Monday, March 24, 2008

America's White Trash Sweetheart All Growed Up

In an effort to reach out to that hard to target "women 19-47 and emotionally unstable and possibly bat shit crazy" demographic, we here at Made 'em Jump occasionally dip our massive ladle of sports knowledge and oft' witty commentary into other "sports" other than our usual realm of basketball, football, and whoring...

To that end, we present you with:

Shannon Miller, the U.S. of A's most decorated gymnast...

Remember those silly 1992-era acid washed bangs?

Remember those washboard...well...entire torso??

Well time, and human growth hormone, have not been kind to her.

She appears to be one face lift away from my childhood hero Skeletor.

Not to completely alienate our zero female readers, I was always a big fan of Dominique Dawes. Not only is D-boogie a DMV native, she was definitely always the best looking of the early 90s US gymnastic sprites. And unlike Ms. Miller and her creepy looks, Dominique kept it real as she got older. Yo D, holla at me when you're in town.

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