Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Potomac Primaries - Dark Horse Candidate

Today's "Potomac Primaries", as Maryland, D.C. and Virginia's presidential primaries have come to be collectively known, was jolted by a late entrant . Most political pundits (read: Idiots) had long since given the Republican and Democratic nods in all three contests to McCain and Obama respectively. What the bowtie and suspender set failed to recognize was the impact a magic midget, could have on voters at the polling stations.

Vikram Etherington Numbai of Miskokey or VENOM chose today's primaries as the ideal time to toss his wee-sized hat into the presidential race. Why, you may ask? Because no one can resist the raw sex appeal of a body-building, Indian midget with a handlebar mustache and blonde shag hair. The voting public must face the facts: resistence is futile!

I for one welcome the soon-to-be next President of the United States. Venom's presidency promises to usher in a new era of equality for those of us who have been repressed due to unbridled sexiness. Hail to the Chief!

(Ed Note: Cobra Commander is expected to be named as VENOM's running mate as early as tomorrow.)

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